Chapters

Looking at the shelves of stores you will find hundreds upon hundreds of parenting books.  While I have read a majority of them, I feel there are some chapters that have been left out. I believe some topics are left out on purpose- frankly because they would scare you away from parenting.  I strongly feel it is my duty to inform parents/future parents about the topics that have been left out.

If I wrote a parenting book, I would add the following chapters:

 

Chapter 1: How to make a quick getaway when your child calls a slightly, middle-aged woman at the mall “Honey-Boo-Boo.”

          Chapter 2: Too Much Junk:  When is it exploring and when is it creepy?

          Chapter 3: Appropriate names for genital areas- Winky-dink or Junk?

         Chapter 4: How to apologize to the Menards worker when your child calls him a “Poopy-butt.”

Chapter 5: How to smoothly switch the subject when your child announces to the shoe department at Target that you have passed gas.

My Sweet Chasey at the park- sporting a vest- like usual.

 

Toddlers are quick, but it is our job, as parents to be quicker (and wittier- if that is possible).